To Conquer and Be Conquered
by gennsis
Summary: All Seijuro wanted was to win in the one thing that mattered to him the most. Yet, love still eluded him. In order to win, he had to break not only those he cared for, but also himself. (Seijuro-centric) (Historical!AU)
1. To Lose Himself (and Find Himself Again)

A/N:

This story is set in the Edo period. I started this because Seijuro's backstory feels particularly fitting in a historical context, and well, I just wanted to challenge myself in writing his character, and something ambiguous but not-too-ambiguous-till-it's-confusing (which always seems to be my problem). Also, there'll be akamomo and kuromomo in this story, because I love those ships and they're also fitting in this historical context xP There will be a lot of psychology and angst (basically like every other drama about royalty out there) so be warned! Also, I tried to stick to Japanese history as much as possible but my forte is really more Korean or Chinese history. Do let me know if there are any inaccuracies!

*Note: Seijuro's mother died when he was much younger in the anime/manga if I'm not wrong, but in this story, she died when he was 13. This change is kinda necessary for the plot.

Planned to be a three-shot.

Genres: Psychology, angst, tragedy, romance(?), historical!AU

* * *

 **I. To Lose Himself (and Find Himself Again)**

 _"She was like a midsummer night's dream. And even though dreams were unrealistic, I followed after her."_

* * *

There was a young child, his scarlet tresses blazing and his red eyes piercing. He was standing in front of his father, whom all hailed as Emperor.

"Emperor, does Queen Mother mean nothing to you at all?" the child questioned with clenched fists and gritting teeth. His mother had had a breathtaking beauty—a smile that was reminiscent of spring and long red locks that flowed with the wind. All which was tarnished when she had caught a deadly illness. All the doctors had deemed her a hopeless case. And so, his father had deemed her a hopeless case too, and had deserted her in the isolation of her quarters. Eventually, she had died, sickly and lonely.

He recalled the deathlike pallor of her face and her trembling, blue lips before she took her last breath. He recalled her last wish.

 _Seijuro, no matter what happens, don't blame your father._

He wanted to, at least for her. But even when the nation had wept for the loss of their Empress, his father had never shown a single concern other than sending his subordinates to settle the funeral matters.

 _It's impossible after all, Queen Mother. I can't not blame him._

The king's face was impassive. His lips thinned into a firm, straight line.

All the king said was, "She is just but a woman. A dead one. Dying is an act of losing."

 _If she is a loser for dying, then when will you admit that you are a failure for not saving her, that you are a failure as both a father and husband, Emperor?_

He continued, "What matters is the living and the winning. Because winning is everything in this world. The victors write history and the losers are wiped from it."

The Emperor's brown orbs bore into him, menacing and oppressive.

"I have more important things to do as the Emperor than to dwell over such trivialities. Rather than to ask me such a foolish question, I believe you should use your time more wisely on studying or sharpening your sword skills. It's disappointing that you display yourself in such a pathetic manner, Crown Prince."

There was no room for objection with how authoritative his tone was.

The prince's eyes grew sore. He swallowed the lump that had formed on his throat, and the liquid which was threatening to pool out from his eyes. His fists were shaking, his tiny body convulsing from the force. But winners did not cry, no matter what.

So he held it in.

He nodded mechanically, face and neck numb.

"Yes… Emperor."

If emotions would brand him as a loser, then he would kill them all. Relentlessly and heartlessly. He would just cease to feel.

He was no longer Seijuro, but the Crown Prince and soon-to-be Emperor.

* * *

It was spring. The bushes and trees were a lush green, and cherry blossoms had bloomed, dotting the landscape of the East Gardens with pink. In the center of them all was a small pond, its water surface clearly reflecting whatever image lying upon it, including Seijuro's face.

The boy stared at his reflection for a while, taking in the sounds of chirping birds, the faint scent of the petals and the bitter flavour of water vapour. This was his mother's and also his favourite place. It had a sense of tranquility, free from gossip and noise, perfect for him to concentrate and play shogi.

Now, it would be perfect for him to cease thinking.

He shut his eyes, letting his soul blend into one with the environment.

"Are you sad?" a soft voice echoed, disrupting the silence.

Slowly, his eyelids were raised, letting a ray of sunlight penetrate his eyes. Standing amidst the light was a petite girl, her pink hair flowing in the wind. Her pink orbs were staring directly into his, with traces of what seemed to be curiosity and wonder.

Seijuro didn't really know her all that well. He only knew that her name was Momoi Satsuki, and she was the only daughter of the shogun, the top military commander of the nation. In a bid to maintain a close relationship with the shogun, the Emperor allowed the girl access to the royal premises. As a result, she became fairly close to the princes, namely Daiki. Momoi Satsuki was praised for her brightness, wit and beauty since young, but still, she was just a girl. She would never be able to take over the position her father held. Instead, she would probably be betrothed to one of the princes in royal family, most likely him.

To him, it didn't matter who she was exactly. As long as she was necessary to pave his path to victory, then he would remember her and make use of her well.

But that question… It had totally caught him off-guard.

Of course, he would not show that.

"Why would I be?" he questioned back, his red irises staring back at hers.

The pinkette tilted her head, asking innocently, "Why would you not be?"

She was avoiding the question. That was a sign of guilt. But the boy could not pick out any other traces of hesitation from the girl's face.

"The Empress has passed away. Dai-chan is actually angry, Sushi-chan doesn't feel like eating for once and even Shin-chan is sad, although he tries to act like he isn't. Even if she's not their birth mother," Satsuki continued, thoughtfully tapping her chin.

Right. The Empress was loved by all, even in the royal family. Despite having different mothers, all the princes had come to respect the Empress or even take a liking to her, because the Empress was benevolent to everyone regardless of race, age or gender. Still, she was just a female with no actual political power, and born as a commoner. That was perhaps why his father never saw her as an equal.

Seijuro never understood why his father insisted on their marriage despite that. Considering his father's personality and the unsaid rules of the royal family, Seijuro was sure he would wed one of royal descent or at least with a flashy family background. But he didn't, and in fact, he had suffered backlash for his actions.

Although the prince was curious, he never really got to know the details, mainly because his father had never divulged a single detail and his mother had always been enigmatic. Some speculated that this was an act out of true love, but how laughable the idea sounded.

"Crown Prince, you're a human," the girl said again, interrupting his train of thought.

"Of course. You are stating the obvious," the redhead curtly replied. Red clashed with pink, both studying the other. What were the intentions of the girl? Perhaps, she was scheming something. After all, he was the Crown Prince, and people only talked to him if they wanted something from him. Though, it was strange how there was no malice in her eyes.

"Humans should be sad when their mothers die. That's also obvious. But Crown Prince, you don't seem sad at all. Just… calm. That's way too peculiar," she noted, continuing to observe every part of his face.

He frowned. The way she scrutinised him so brazenly made him feel like he was a specimen to be inspected. Was she trying to source for his weaknesses so that she would use them to her advantage later on?

Well, she was not going to find any. He was the Crown Prince, Seijuro—always calm and collected, yet assertive. No one was going to spoil that image of his.

"Winners are not sad. Leave me alone this instance," the redhead stated, his tone as firm and solid as his father's. For a moment, his left eye turned into a vague tint of orange.

With that, he believed that the girl would be chased away. Everyone, even high-ranking officials, would back off after hearing that. But, all the girl did was let out a knowing smile, not the least perturbed.

Without a word, she walked off. The boy sighed in both relief and satisfaction. However, minutes later, the girl came skipping back, placing a peach rose on his palm. The stem was devoid of thorns.

Seijuro glanced up at the girl. She raised her index finger up her lips, as if signaling that she had been obedient. Her smile was reminiscent of spring.

As abruptly as she came, she left again.

Seijuro heaved a sharp breath and diverted his attention back to the lone peach flower.

* * *

" _Queen Mother, you must love flowers a lot," Seijuro once remarked upon seeing how his mother was arranging flowers again. The queen only beamed, touching the petals of the flowers gently._

" _They're beautiful, aren't they, Seijuro?"_

" _They are, but they'll eventually wither. I see no point in having them," he voiced out his true opinion. To him, flowers were just impractical things that people kept to comfort themselves that there was indeed beauty in this world. He wondered why his mother loved them so much, considering that she dealt with more meaningful arts._

" _You are right. But that goes the same for life, Seijuro. Beautiful but fleeting," she pointed out, pausing momentarily as she held onto a peach rose._

 _She asked, "Do you see this peach rose?"_

 _Seijuro nodded as a signal for her to continue. He examined the flower. It had a light tinge of soft peach, which was calming to see. But the stem had thorns._

 _Unfazed, the queen swiftly de-thorned the rose as she continued, "It symbolises sincerity, peace, purity and innocence. As long as it lives, it has this meaning, and we can use it to convey what we want to another person by passing this precious life to another. Isn't that wonderful?"_

 _There were no longer thorns remaining on the stem. The queen passed the flower to the prince whose eyes widened slightly upon receiving it._

 _It was the first flower he received from anyone. And his heart swelled, keeping the feelings harboured inside the peach rose in mind._

 _Later on, his mother continued to ramble on about the meanings of other flowers. Seijuro patiently listened. Flowers were louder than words._

* * *

He smiled, nostalgia filling him.

Momoi Satsuki. She was unusual, but probably harmless.

* * *

"Crown Prince, want to play?"

It was summer. It was her again.

Well, she was pretty much always with the princes, but perhaps seeing her in a new light made him recognise her presence. He might have dismissed her initial intentions off as pure, but the act nonetheless baffled him.

Why would she give him such a flower?

Still, figuring out her purpose behind that act was not his main priority.

"I have to study," he replied as curtly as ever.

"I don't get what's so fun about studying... Why are you obsessed with it every single day, Seijuro? Oh well, not like it matters to me," Daiki remarked as he played around with a ball. It was his new plaything. He would often beckon the brothers, and sometimes Satsuki, to play ball with him. That was the only common activity that allowed the brothers to bond.

"That's because you're stupid, Dai-chan," Satsuki blurted out.

"At least I'm great with a ball unlike you, Satsuki," he casually remarked. Of course, that resulted in him receiving a mega smack from Satsuki.

"…I don't understand Sei-chin too. I would never study, unless I get snacks," Atsushi murmured.

Folding her arms, Satsuki rebuked the giant, "You're going to become fat at this rate, Sushi-chan!" It was rather amusing to see how the peach-haired girl was scolding someone who pretty much towered over her. If Seijuro could use an analogy, it was like a mouse squeaking in front of an elephant.

"I have to agree with that. You should control your diet, Atsushi," he concurred.

"I'm tall. That's fine, isn't it?" Atsushi said, sulking now that two people were nagging at him.

"What does that have to do with anything? You'll grow tall _and_ fat!" Satsuki exclaimed, almost exasperated.

Atsushi shrugged, popping a candy into his mouth as he said, "All emperors are fat, but nobody says anything. Correct me if I'm wrong."

An eerie silence loomed over the six for a moment, but later, peals of laughter rippled out, notably from Ryota and Daiki.

"Y-You're actually right, Sushi-cchi! I-I can't- Ahahaha!" Ryota stumbled over his words amidst his guffawing.

Seijuro shook his head, saying with a warning tone, "The Emperor will scold you if he hears that, Atsushi."

"He scolds me all the time anyway… No difference. But it helps that you're the eldest, not me," Atsushi stated with a bored expression on his face.

Daiki nodded.

"Yeah, thanks a lot Seijuro."

The only green-haired boy pushed up his glasses, stating sternly, "All of you have to stop relying on Seijuro already."

Nudging the green-haired boy playfully, Daiki asked, "Why, you want to become King, Shintaro? You know that's impossible with Seijuro around. Plus, you're the forth oldest. I'll probably take over the position before you do."

Huffing, Shintaro ignored the navy-haired boy as he said, "I do not care about such things. However, I will beat Seijuro one day. That's for sure."

Smirking, Seijuro replied to his declaration, "You can try, Shintaro. But I always win."

They were noisy, indeed. Yet, at times, he didn't really mind their blabbering.

It reminded him he was still alive, and there were still people he cared for.

He stalked off to his refuge of solitary, where no pesky brothers or girl would disrupt his peace.

* * *

…Or at least, he thought so, until he heard a pair of light footsteps behind him, echoing when he moved and fading when he stopped.

Fed up with this 'game', he asked the follower, "Why did you follow me?"

There was a small chuckle in the air, as the follower answered, "Why not?" Of course, it had to be her, and she was being just as ambiguous as before.

She was using his manner of speech back at him.

Her intentions were still very much unclear, but he would find out in due time.

Giving up on the question for now, he asked next, "Aren't you scared of me?"

"Yes."

The reply was surprisingly quick and honest. He turned back, facing a peach-haired girl who seemed somewhat flustered by her own statement.

He was right. She was putting on a front after all. Yet, he could sense no deception from her, just slight fear and… courage. How was it possible that two contradicting feelings intertwined together?

"I-I mean, I was scared! But then, I can't be scared of someone who told me to leave him alone. That's just not right," she added, fidgeting with her hands slightly. Nonetheless, she held his gaze, and her tone was determined.

With that, he deemed her to be truthful.

"Explain," he commanded.

Satsuki tilted her head.

"Uh… Explain?" she hesitated momentarily, as if thinking through her words, before continuing, "When someone says to leave him alone, it's either false or half true and half false. But ultimately, he doesn't want to be left alone—at least, I can't think of anyone who wants to be. I know that, because I feel that too. Even for Shin-chan, Dai-chan, Sushi-chan and Ryotan, that seems to be the case. So, I thought it's the same for you, Crown Prince."

That was new. He had never placed such a value in these three words. In fact, he had always taken them literally.

 _Was that what the Emperor meant when he said those words?_

He shook his head. Impossible. His father was never one to put double meaning into words, even if he might be ambiguous at other occasions. His commands were always absolute. And he thought he, himself, was the same too.

But the peach rose had thawed the ice around his heart somehow, allowing him to understand the girl with a new mindset.

"I see. You analyse people, don't you?" he noted. In this palace, everyone was analysing one another, in hope to exploit one another's weaknesses. But the peach-haired girl didn't seem to do that for that very reason.

A wry grin surfaced on her face as she nodded, saying, "People are fascinating to watch, but almost too predictable. Especially so in this palace."

So she returned his sentiments.

"And may I ask, where do I fit in in between?"

She raised her index finger up to her lips. It was a repeat of the same gesture from before.

"It's a secret. It's no fun if you know everything, Crown Prince!"

Mirth danced in the peach-haired girl's eyes.

Normally, ambiguity was used to dismiss, evade or trick.

But coming from her, it just seemed cheeky, playful and _fun_.

"So be it."

He might allow such imprudence from time to time.

Finally, he reached his destination—the library. He picked up a book and settled down on a chair.

"Are you not playing with the rest?" he questioned, neither irked nor delighted. Akashi Seijuro was always calm, a doll whose strings to feelings had been cut.

The peach-haired girl took another book and chirped, "I changed my mind. I'll stay and study with you."

* * *

The time was strangely quiet, other than the flipping of pages. The musty odour of books lingered in the air. Despite seeming like one who would ramble on and on about useless things, the pink-haired girl was rather concentrated in her book.

For once, Seijuro thought he wouldn't mind studying with her again.

He could tell the sun was setting. The sky blue of the landscape transformed into warm orange. The glorious sun was retreating into its bed, its remaining rays of light shining through the small window of the library, landing onto the girl beside him. Soon, it would be night.

The light reflected her; she reflected the light.

"Crown Prince, I may not be in any position to say this, but…" she paused, deliberating over her words.

"Isn't it better if you cry it out?"

Did she think he was sad, after all? And where did her persistence come from? He was sure he hadn't acted out of the ordinary.

He said placidly, "I simply do not understand your insistence. If that's your impression of me, I must've failed."

"Does feeling sad mean you've failed?" she questioned again.

Without a doubt.

"Of course."

She looked up from her book, gazing straight into his eyes.

"I disagree."

Seijuro raised his eyebrows. Nobody disagreed with him. No one.

"There's this quote… 'You can only know how to stand up when you fall'. When you feel sad, you'll only know how it likes to feel happy again. That's what I believe in," she proclaimed with a fervent energy, her eyes twinkling amidst the light.

"That does not make sense," he immediately concluded. Because all along, he believed victory was the only answer. Introducing other variables would just complicate his route further.

And in shogi—in fact, in any other activity, winning was the final destination. There was no way one could lose and win again.

Satsuki smiled slightly, before stating, "Because you're not trying to make sense of it, Crown Prince."

He observed her—the way her lips quirked up, and the way her eyes faced his.

"This is the magic of the world. Everything's unpredictable, and no theory fits all. It's always subjective, always changing. Isn't that what makes the world interesting?" she questioned.

Then, she shut her book.

"That's why… I believe we should at least take charge of our own lives. Whether we want to feel sad, happy, angry, we should let our bodies feel the way they want to feel. And release these feelings in a way fitting for us, only," she concluded.

She didn't understand; she was still too naïve. In order to feel, one had to be prepared to break free from all restrictions placed on them. And Seijuro was certain he would never do that.

But, he wouldn't mind being himself again sometimes. If it was her, he was sure it would be fine.

It would be fine to escape from reality once in a while.

* * *

She was here again. And here on the next day. Somehow, studying in the library became their common routine.

"Crown Prince, if I may ask, what is your dream for the future?" she asked, her pink irises still fixated onto her book. The book was titled 'Sieges, Battles, Takeovers'.

Dream…? He always only had one dream: To succeed the throne. But what lay beyond that?

He thought of the peach rose, its petals fluttering with the wind. He thought of his trips out to the city, the people's merry laughter and conversations. He thought of his brothers, their useless chattering, and her smile.

"To maintain the peace," he replied.

Then, she looked up from her book, staring directly into him.

"Promise me you'll do just that," she said.

He nodded.

"I promise."

Promises were made to be broken.


	2. To Change with the Change

A/N: This is the age order for all those curious souls. Excluding Tetsuya and Satsuki, the GoM's age order is the reverse of that in KnB lol.

Tetsuya Seijuro Satsuki Atsushi Daiki Shintaro Ryota

* * *

 **II. To Change with the Change**

 _"The only way to pull ahead when things change is to change in a way that exceeds the change itself."_

* * *

A few months had passed. As they were symbols of the blessings of the gods, Seijuro, Shintaro and Atsushi were sent to see the soldiers-in-training in a feat to raise their morale. Well, that was probably the excuse given to the shogun, at least. Seijuro knew that they had a bigger mission; they were there to consolidate their power for the Imperial Family and gain allies.

After he had observed the military's training, Seijuro commented, "Our army is strong, but it seems like we're missing a decisive factor that will ascertain our victory."

"Does it matter? We won when there were wars anyway. Besides, isn't this the business of the shogun?" Atsushi questioned, yawning. His purple-haired younger brother was certainly not meant for politics. He had the temperament of a child and apathy of a robot. All was fine for him, Seijuro thought. The thought of turning against his own brother later on was less than pleasant. He would rather avoid it.

After the training was over, they chanced upon their navy-haired brother who was practicing sword play at the corner.

"So this is where you've been to, Daiki," Seijuro noted.

"Seijuro," Daiki acknowledged.

The crown prince's attentive red eyes took note of the boy beside his brother, only recognising his presence a few seconds later. The boy's complexion was ghastly pale. He had sky blue hair and eyes, as well as an oddly faint presence for a soldier. He was almost reminiscent to that of a ghost.

"Who is that?" he questioned.

"He is Kuroko Tetsuya, a soldier-in-training!" Daiki proudly proclaimed. It was unusual that his brother would be so eager to introduce another, Seijuro mused.

"Eh? Someone like that is in our army?" Atsushi questioned, narrowing his eyes at the newcomer.

Shintaro scoffed as he stated, "I see that our army has become a failure."

Seijuro observed the boy once more. No matter how terrible one might be, it was only natural for one to exude even a little bit of presence after some training. Yet, the boy was an anomaly. He was basically invisible.

A smirk crept its way up on Seijuro's face. This boy was an unpolished gem, and should he be able to create his own unique fighting style, he would be the talent their army would need.

 _Men are to be used as pawns, Seijuro. You just have to know when and how to use your pawns._

"I am fascinated. Kuroko Tetsuya, I would like to talk to you for a moment," he said. All three stared at him, dumb-struck, but he ignored the dubious gazes as he led the boy away from the crowd.

"Your lack of presence is unusual. If you capitalise on this well, you'll definitely become an exemplary soldier," he commented.

He noticed how a new light lit up inside the boy's eyes. He was there to provide hope, but ultimately, the boy himself must carve out his own path if he wished to succeed. Only then would the boy prove his worth.

Leaving him to contemplate with his last words, Seijuro left.

* * *

"Ote," he voiced. The sound of pieces clinking against the board had ceased. Shintaro furrowed his eyebrows.

"Once more," the green-haired boy insisted. It was odd how the forth oldest prince had more ambition and drive than the second oldest, who was a sloth in comparison. Still, there was no denying either brother's talents.

Shintaro was well-versed in the arts as well as archery. None of his shots had missed, no matter the distance of his target from him. Furthermore, he was intelligent, able to recite poems with eloquence and ease. Even his Koto playing was immaculate. Lastly, and most importantly, he was competitive and hardworking, presumably because of his mother's strict upbringing. Even if Seijuro wasn't the crown prince, he was sure that Shintaro would become a great King on his own right.

Atsushi was something else entirely. His presence was domineering and enough to intimidate enemies entirely. But other than being tall, he also had extremely explosive power when striking down his opponents. Sword play might be his only strength, but it was an undeniable fact that Atsushi was able to shut down opponents of all kinds.

In the midst of their shogi match, Shintaro asked, "Do you think that Kuroko Tetsuya is the talent we need?"

"I believe so, but ultimately, it's all up to him," Seijuro replied placidly, moving a pawn.

The green-haired boy raised his eyebrows through he said nothing. From experience, none of his brothers questioned Seijuro on his decisions, as eccentric as they might be sometimes. Because Seijuro was always right.

"For a moment, I can almost believe that you'll take over the power the Imperial Family has lost to the shogun," Shintaro commented.

"Not almost… You should," Seijuro replied.

The shogun currently held the greatest power, but Seijuro knew that the shogun's era was going to end soon. The Imperial Family had been gaining more power day by day, and Seijuro knew that his father was making preparations on his own. The last straw would be Momoi Satsuki marrying off to the Imperial Family, serving as a 'hostage'. As the saying goes, keep your friends close and enemies closer to you.

Her innocent smile flashed across his head. Such dirty political matters were not something she should be involved in; they would only taint her. Yet, he knew it was inevitable that she would be embroiled into it ultimately. She might even grow to hate him, for he was about to become an accomplice to his father's plan.

But, there was no choice. Crown Prince he might be, but his father still possessed more authority. He, on the other hand, was still very much powerless, which was why he could only follow his father's footsteps for that moment of time. The time when he established his own force would be the time he would create a new world and protect those he cherished.

If he could keep his brothers and her away from the deception of politics, then he would. Let the world pollute, corrupt and break him. As long as they retained the innocence he could not keep, he would take it all without hesitation.

* * *

"Crown Prince, I am Kuroko Tetsuya, your bodyguard from now on."

While Seijuro expected that the invisible guy would prove his capabilities, this came as a surprise. For him to be assigned such a significant role meant that his father had acknowledged his skills, which was no easy feat.

"Guess you've proved me right, Kuroko. You would definitely make a good assassin," Seijuro mused.

Kuroko's expression remained impassive.

"I do not commit such unscrupulous deeds."

"I am joking."

Kuroko blinked. The redhead only offered an enigmatic smile.

Nodding slowly, the blue-haired soldier proceeded to kneel, his posture upright and his gaze on the redhead firm.

"From now onwards, I will be your sword, Crown Prince. Use me as you please," he said.

The crown prince merely nodded back at him, a triumphant smile surfacing on his face.

* * *

"Bodyguard? It sounds like the Emperor is babying you, Sei-kun," Satsuki remarked. After some time since their fateful first actual conversation with each other, Seijuro had pointed out the disconcerting fact that she addressed all his brothers by nicknames, yet stuck to the rigid address of 'Crown Prince' for him. The girl had laughed it off, claiming that it was because of her initial apprehension towards him, before settling with a more affectionate nickname.

Seijuro never thought he liked nicknames much, but a sense of warmth filled him whenever she called him by that nickname.

It was another day with the pink-haired girl in the library, but this time round, she wasn't holding onto a book. Instead, she was holding onto a needle, weaving thread around the slants of a white fabric that depicted a lily. It complemented her white, flowery kimono very well, he noticed.

"What a terrible way of putting it, Satsuki," Seijuro noted, a hint of amusement in his voice.

"Every prince is assigned a bodyguard; it's only natural that this eventually happens for me."

"Guess I should thank my lucky stars that I'm not subjected to such restrictions," Satsuki said. He knew she was someone very unlike him. Her pink irises glimmered with curiosity for the adventure outside, one that could not be suppressed by the confines of the palace. There would come a day when her naïve hope would be extinguished—after all, young girls were cultivated for the pleasure of their spouses—but Seijuro chose not to dwell on that less than pleasant fact.

After stitching the fabric into a pouch, the girl placed a talisman inside before tying the omamori tassel knot for the finishing touch.

"I'm done," she exclaimed in relief, her shoulders relaxing.

"What are you scheming?" he asked. The omamori she finished sewing didn't look suspicious, but so did the girl herself. One could never be too careful.

"Don't make it sound like I always plan something bad, Sei-kun!" she huffed, putting her hands against her hips.

"Says the one who gave me a peach rose during our first official conversation. Are you bribing someone else with this little amulet now?"

Seijuro scrutinised her embroidery. An omomori was a simple item to make, but her stitches were incredibly fine and neat. He would expect no less from the pink-haired girl.

She smirked, repeating the 'shush' sign she had been using since their very first meeting. Seijuro wondered why she liked that gesture so much. Strangely, he didn't dislike it. In fact, he might have grown a little fond for it.

"Guilty as charged," she said.

"Your secret is safe with me," he replied back.

Emitting a light giggle, she finally revealed her true intention, "Actually, today is my mother's birthday. This is my gift for her." Safe to say, it was nothing suspicious. The mention of her mother did cause a little ache in Seijuro's heart. He chose to ignore it.

"I see. Send my well wishes to her," he said, pausing before adding, "I may have a gift for her."

Satsuki blinked, tilting her head slightly. The crown prince did not elaborate further; instead, he chose to leave the library, stepping out to the warm embrace of the sun. Light footsteps followed after him without so much of a protest or complaint. The smell of flowers and earthy scent from the soil travelled to them once they entered the East Garden.

Seijuro stopped at a bush filled with peach roses. Careful not to let the thorns prick him, he held his grip onto one of the stems before gingerly pulling it.

"I doubt so, but do you happen to have a knife, Satsuki?" he asked the girl beside him.

The pink-haired girl allowed a chuckle to escape her lips as she rebuked the crown prince, "Knives are too dangerous to be carried around, and you know that, Sei-kun."

She took the stem from him, dipping her head slightly into a light bow.

"But still, I appreciate the sentiment. Do not worry; I will rid the stem of its thorns later," she said.

As her attention was directed to the bush in front of them, her irises dilated in amusement.

"At this rate, the poor bush will be robbed of its roses," she remarked.

He nodded, a faint smile ghosting over his lips. For a while, they had been exchanging flowers of all sorts, but peach roses had been their favourite gifts.

"It will be," he reaffirmed.

He wished this peace would last, forever and ever.

* * *

"Oi, Tetsu! You're now Seijuro's bodyguard, huh?" Daiki noted, lightly jogging towards the duo.

"Good morning, Prince Daiki. I'm now officially a royal guard," Kuroko acknowledged, bowing to the prince. Although his tone was as monotonous as ever, Seijuro could tell that he exuded an air of confidence and pride.

"Great that you are! Training is boring without you."

"Both of you sure are chummy," Seijuro noted, mirth lighting up his eyes as he watched the two.

He continued, "However, control yourself when in public, Daiki. It's inappropriate for the royalty to be too close to commoners. I'm sure the secret trainings have not gone unnoticed."

"Yeah yeah. Such a nag as always, Seijuro," Daiki said, dismissing his words with a shrug. Seijuro sighed. Sometimes, Daiki's apathy towards rules could be very troubling.

"Daiki-cchi! Seijuro-cchi!" Ryota yelled, skipping towards them.

"Ryota. Just as well. Since you're going to pick up sword skills soon, you can learn from Kuroko," Seijuro proposed. Just then, the blonde's gaze turned to the phantom soldier beside them. He widened his eyes and jumped a little, scratching his head.

"This guy…?" he questioned hesitantly, clearly having some reservations.

"Is he a soldier-in-training?"

"I'm Kuroko Tetsuya, the Crown Prince's bodyguard," Kuroko introduced himself.

"Ehhh?! A bodyguard? You?"

If it was possible to widen already widened eyes anymore, Ryota did just that. The prince's eyes were fixated on the seemingly feeble boy in front of him, scanning him up and down.

"He may look like that, but he's actually really great. Just watch, Ryota," Daiki chipped in.

"Ehh… Okay…" the blonde sulked, drooping his head in resignation.

* * *

Initially, there were mixed responses to the arrival of Kuroko. Shintaro and Atsushi both expressed bewilderment, but when they observed a practice match with Kuroko itself, they were able to see him unleash his true potential. Soon, they begrudgingly acknowledged his talent.

Even Ryota who looked sceptical initially was full of praises after a match with the bodyguard and other soldiers.

It was not long before the phantom soldier joined in their little group, his calm presence serving as a breath of fresh air to the otherwise boisterous group of princes. Not to mention, he was a great team player and excelled in boosting the morale of his fellow soldiers. He was a great asset to the military, just as Seijuro had predicted him to be.

"Seems like you've caught the eye of many, Kuroko," he told the bodyguard one day.

"I wonder if that's supposed to be a good thing, Crown Prince…"

* * *

New Year celebrations had come, which was the primary cause of the festive atmosphere that had lingered in the streets. The New Year party in the palace was luxurious, no doubt, but there were more formal pleasantries than amiable laughter. Perhaps, that was what stemmed the youngest prince's resolve for a risky adventure.

"I have an idea! Let's sneak out tonight!" Ryota proposed.

"What a foolish idea. Royalty is not supposed to leave the palace so casually, Ryota," Shintaro immediately refuted the suggestion.

"I have to agree. The Emperor will not be pleased if he finds out," Seijuro concurred. Besides, compared to the hustle and bustle outside, the crown prince preferred the solitude of the palace.

He wouldn't mind venturing out with his brothers, though.

"Too lazy…" Daiki said, stretching out his muscular limbs.

"I'm sick of the palace food. I'll go," Atsushi mumbled.

The blonde nodded in approval to the purple-haired giant, but gave a disapproving glare to the rest.

"Come on! I heard the streets have really fun things going on!" he whined, utilising the gift of the youngest to the best of his ability.

"In fact, they do. I tried sneaking out last year," Satsuki added, a devious glint surfacing in his eyes. Seijuro didn't miss the wink she sent to Ryota, and the wink the blonde sent back to her.

"Are you the one leading Ryota astray, Satsuki?" Seijuro questioned, massaging his temples. However, a rebellious streak inside him tempted him to accede to the two's outrageous demands. He heaved a sigh under his breath. One day, his leniency towards his brothers and her were going to cause his demise.

"I'm not always a bad influence, Sei-kun," the pink-haired girl retaliated, pouting.

The redhead narrowed his eyes, stating, "Other than Daiki, you're the only troublesome one. And Daiki will not go through such effort."

"Maybe because you're spoiling me too much, Sei-kun. If you really tried, I won't even dream about doing these things," she pointed out, and she was right. Despite being a nuisance sometimes, she never disobeyed the Crown Prince, her father or the Emperor. She knew her limits, and she constantly challenged them. And he had let her do so, knowing all of that.

"Now is the time I'll do just that. Going out is simply not an option; it's impossible," he concluded in a sense of finality. Both the overenthusiastic teenagers groaned.

"If you are worried about not having protection, I can accompany you all, Crown Prince. I know where we can get commoners' garments," his invisible bodyguard offered. Everyone flinched slightly except for Seijuro, but Satsuki had the biggest reaction.

"W-Wah! Who are you?" she exclaimed, her eyes analysing the newcomer with caution and alert.

"I am Kuroko Tetsuya, the Crown Prince's bodyguard."

"Huh… How interesting," she mentioned, her lips quirking up into a wry grin.

"Nice one, Kuroko-cchi!" Ryota yelled, flashing the soldier a thumbs up.

On the other hand, Seijuro was silent, his face wrinkling in contemplation.

Eventually, he complied, "Fine. However, we will be going back by midnight, and this will be the first and last time we are doing this. Understood?"

Unable to suppress their overwhelming delight, both overenthusiastic teenagers nodded eagerly, dramatically bowing to Seijuro like he was the savior that had rescued them from lifetime imprisonment.

Shintaro raised his eyebrows, asking the redhead, "Seijuro, is this fine?"

"Yes. Shintaro, you should come along too. You deserve a break," he said. The green-haired boy only nodded, expressing neither joy nor reluctance.

Daiki yawned, saying, "I'm not involved in this."

"You are, Dai-chan!"

And Daiki was just dragged along with them by the same two overenthusiastic teenagers.

* * *

The street lights and lanterns illuminated the night sky. Food and game stalls were scattered messily on the edges of the pavement. There were resounding calls from the stall owners to the people walking by, inciting them to participate in certain activities. Most of the crowd was segregated to couples or groups and their merry laughter reverberated in the air, some engaging in a game of Japanese mahjong or joining in a fierce competition of _Dajare_ , a form of comic Japanese wordplay. Strong smells of tempura and soba travelled to the surrounding people, causing many to stop by the respective stalls just to take a bite.

"Now, that is what we call the New Year atmosphere!" Ryota piped, skipping energetically around the streets. The six were clad with commoners' clothing, which Seijuro hoped was obtained with legitimate means on Kuroko's part.

To no one's surprise, the purple-haired giant of their group already wandered off to a stall selling mochi and other Japanese sweets and came back later with a packet filled of said items.

"Sweets…" Atsushi mumbled, a perpetual smile plastered on his face as he relished in the savoury goods.

As soon as the purple-haired prince let his guard down, the navy-haired boy swooped in to steal one of his sweets casually and nonchalantly.

"Hey, this is better than the ones in the palace!" Daiki yelled out his word of acknowledgement as he began to steal even more and more sweets.

"Dai-chin…"

The giant glowered, hugging the packet of sweets close to him protectively. And there embarked a game of catching, with Daiki attempting to snag a few sweets and Atsushi dodging him and sending less-than-subtle threats to his brother.

"Typical Dai-chan and Sushi-chan," Satsuki said, her lips curling into a contented smile.

"Hey! There's even a _Kabuki_ play!" Ryota pointed out. At the corner, there was a _hanamichi_ set up, a platform which extended into the crowd while elevating the performers on it. The performers had faces caked with makeup, and they wore the traditional clothing of commoners. Unlike the usual _jidaimono_ , a play focusing on the samurai class, which the princes often saw in the palace, this play appeared to be a _sewamono_ , its main topic being the commoners.

The group of four watched the play with mild intrigue and horror. It was a retelling of drama within families, painting a dreadful picture of famine and desperation. The audience was participating actively, emitting voices of concern and worry for the main characters. Fervent discussions took place in the crowd, some rebuking the authorities involved, but none ever mentioning the shogun, at least directly.

 _Is this what it means to be King? To prevent such calamities from happening, and to assure the citizens peace?_

As Seijuro fell into deep reflection, the bodyguard beside him looked up to him, a trusting smile on his face.

"I believe you will become a good King, Crown Prince," he said.

The pink-haired girl nodded along gleefully.

"My father will work with you, and we'll make this nation remain strong," she added.

 _The Emperor will not wait until that day, Satsuki._

"Yeah! You'll be awesome, Seijuro-cchi!"

"…Indeed. I will admit, you'll become an astounding King."

A strangely fuzzy feeling took over him, and with that, a sense of responsibility stemmed inside him. Nodding firmly, he turned to the four who placed his trust on him.

"I will make sure of that," he declared.

The rest of the day was spent with him playing shogi against Shintaro, the six battling in _Daifugo_ and _Sudoku_. To no one's surprise, Seijuro won all games. The losers of both * _Daifugo_ and * _Sudoku_ , Ryota and Daiki, were forced to treat them all to sushi.

 _*Daifugo – A Japanese card game which objective is to get rid of all cards as fast as possible by playing progressively stronger cards than the next player._

 _*Sudoku – A logic-based puzzle which objective is to fill numbers into the blanks of a 9x9 grid, filled with 3x3 subgrids (boxes). No numbers in a column, row or box can overlap._

As his brothers began bickering about another stupid thing, Seijuro watched them, his lips curling into a faint smile.

For a moment, Seijuro could forget his status as the Crown Prince. For a moment, Seijuro almost felt like his own self, Seijuro. For a moment, Seijuro could _feel_ again.

Even if they risked his father's punishment, Seijuro thought he wouldn't mind doing this again, for the next year and the year after it.

However, before he knew it, there was no longer a 'next time'.

* * *

"Tetsu-kun!"

Even if his brothers' sudden interest towards the phantom soldier was a bit unexpected, he never saw the pink-haired girl's affection towards him coming. What began as amusement soon watered down to slight irritation. Only _slight_.

"Momoi-sama," Kuroko greeted back, only to be enveloped into an enthusiastic and suffocating hug.

"Please let me go, Momoi-sama. This is not appropriate," he chided the girl.

"Sorry, I was just too excited!" she laughed, finally releasing her iron-like grip on the boy. They could only be thankful there was no one in sight; if not, trouble remained for the two.

"You should be more wary of your actions, Satsuki. It's a miracle that you have not dealt with any consequences for your rashness yet," Seijuro also scolded her.

"Okay, I'll be a good girl. Don't go on and on, Sei-kun!" she hastily assured the redhead. Things always went out-of-hand whenever the crown prince went on nagging mode.

"That being said, I did not know you two are already familiar with each other," he commented, his eyebrows furrowing. The facts that things happened without his knowledge and that neither Satsuki nor Kuroko had told him about their budding relationship irked him a little. It was a childish thought, but he deigned himself in it for that moment.

"Well… He gave me a * _wagashi_ ," Satsuki explained, scratching her cheek sheepishly. Seijuro raised an eyebrow, but Satsuki immediately diverted the focus of the conversation away before he could probe even further.

 _*wagashi – A type of Japanese confection served with tea_

"Tetsu-kun, the book you told me the other day is great!" she chirped.

There was a faint—barely noticeable—smile on Kuroko's face.

"I'm glad to hear that."

* * *

The redhead watched at the sidelines. There was the way Satsuki's eyes would light up whenever she saw his bodyguard, and the way her steps had a light spring to it. Although she was normally affectionate, she never showered the other princes with as many hugs as she did to the bodyguard. Her hands would fidget nervously when she talked to him, and every time or so she would play with the loose fabric of her kimono. It didn't take a genius to find out that Satsuki liked Kuroko in a way she never liked anyone else. What was that called… Romantic love, perhaps?

Perhaps Seijuro should give her his blessings. It meant she would pay less attention to him, and there would be less distractions for him. He had given her space that was more than necessary in his life, he realised. But the thought of it also bothered him.

She would pay less attention to him… She was going to love another… She was going to leave, just like his mother.

And he didn't like that. He was supposed to be winning in everything—including her.

"The flowers are especially beautiful today," she chirped.

The sessions in the library and walks in the garden with her had continued, but there was another participant. His bodyguard followed along, and Seijuro wanted to ignore the secret glances the girl had sent the bodyguard beside him. The girl's gaze was no longer directed at him; she was looking at someone else.

Somehow, Seijuro felt like an extra. Which should be wrong. He never was an extra.

"Yes, they do, Momoi-sama," the blue-haired boy offered. Normally, Kuroko didn't express much feeling towards anything, but he was smiling a lot lately. Those smiles weren't obvious, but the faint smiles he had were evidence of his growing fondness to the girl.

Seijuro wasn't blind, definitely. He knew when to back off. That was the time.

"I am going to take a look at the flowers over there."

That was an excuse. He noticed how the pink-haired girl nodded, maybe a bit too eagerly. At the corner of his eye, he saw how she plucked a red rose from a bush and offered it to the soldier. The soldier accepted it, the smile never fading from his face. And his heart ached terribly, so terribly, because Seijuro knew the intonations behind giving a red rose.

 _The red rose is the ultimate symbol of romance and love._

He was not the recipient of that flower, and he would never be.

Yet, he knew another thing. Their love, or whatever feeling it was called, would never last. No matter how affectionate the shogun was to his daughter, the shogunate was now considered a part of royalty. Relationships with the royalty and commoners never fared well.

Was it a problem that he silently took pleasure in that fact?

Then came a thought which he dreaded the most. When Satsuki felt, she felt _hard_. She never disobeyed the rules all along simply because she didn't feel the need to, but if she had to, she would. And that would break her.

He turned his head away from the in front of him. No. She wasn't going to break. He was going to protect her and uphold the peace, just like he promised before. That meant casting away his selfishness.

His shoulders slumped, he retreated to a corner. He was so tired. So, very tired.

* * *

Change crept up to him, slowly but steadily.

It was time for him to wed a bride.

And it came as no surprise to him when his father requested for both Satsuki's and his presence.

"Momoi Satsuki will be betrothed to you. You've known her since young, so I'm sure both of you will have no complaints to this situation," the Emperor instructed them. There was no room for objection.

"No!"

He expected reluctance, not a sharp protest. Regret flashed through the pink-haired girl's face, but it was too late. The damage was already done.

He didn't want to admit it, but it hurt.

"I-I'm sorry Crown Prince. But, I've only loved one all along…" she attempted to explain. Her words sounded all jumbled and mangled in his head.

"…I know," he forced himself to say it.

Her acute confirmation hurt even more.

"I-Is there no other way? Emperor, if I may plead you…"

Her eyes were brimmed with tears, those of desperation, but never did the pink-haired girl let them loose even once. She only stood her ground, staring at the Emperor with greater determination than what was normal.

"You… refuse?" the Emperor questioned in slight disbelief. Satsuki nodded mutely, fists clenched in fiery determination.

Nobody who retaliated against the Emperor ended up well.

 _There is no other choice._

In a haste, Seijuro cut in, "I do not like her as well, not in the romantic sense. Satsuki has only been a beloved little sister to me. That is all."

The Emperor's contempt did not cease; in fact, its flames were fueled.

Taking a sharp breath, he ordered the pink-haired girl to step down. The pink-haired girl sent the Crown Price an uneasy gaze, which he returned with a firm nod. Hesitantly, the pink-haired girl took her leave.

"…Who does she like? Daiki?" the Emperor asked, his tone low and menacing.

"No, that's not the case, Emperor. It is none of our brothers," he continued to say, reminiscent to an emotionless doll.

"There is another man? Yet, she has been only interacting with you bunch!"

Finally, the Emperor heaved in several breaths, his rage subsiding but not disappearing just yet. He stared down at the Crown Prince, his figure almost towering.

"I believe you know who that man is, and you will not tell. I will not ask, either. However, this marriage is significant in our plan to overthrow the shogun once and for all. Therefore, this marriage will proceed as planned. Your feelings, and the feelings of the daughter of the Momoi clan—they are never in the equation to begin with," he announced, the clarity of his words ringing in the air. The superior man did not say anything else, but Seijuro caught the undertone of his intimidating voice.

Beneath the sea of brown, there was a knowing glint.

 _It's appalling that you think you can escape from me. I know everything. Momoi Satsuki loves Kuroko Tetsuya, and you are merely lying to protect her. To think that you would commit such an act in front of me…_

 _It's disappointing that you display yourself in such a pathetic manner, Crown Prince._

And later, the glint warped into a threatening one.

 _This is your last chance. Lose it, and you'll see that the bodyguard and the girl you cherish so much will suffer._

He knew it. He knew _everything_! He knew Seijuro would bend at the expense of his wishes in order to fit the mold of victory he had set anyway, and that resistance was futile. That was why the Emperor didn't even bother giving punishments to the girl who just went against his order, or the boy who defended her.

They were all pawns, playing in the game the Emperor had so meticulously orchestrated.

"Is that all you think about, Emperor?" he coughed out, bile forming in his throat, almost about to suffocate and deprive him from air. His father's eyes were cold and unsympathetic.

"My word is final, Seijuro. Besides, if you can't even change a measly woman's heart…"

"…you cannot take charge of this kingdom."

The gentle breeze had warped into a ferocious tornado. And in the midst of it all, there was Seijuro, his scarlet tresses blazing and his red eyes piercing. He was being whirled away into the gloom lurking inside him. This time, there was no salvation for him.

* * *

"Crown Prince, I've heard about it."

Standing right in front of him was his phantom bodyguard. It was safe to say that the redhead acknowledged his talent and determination, and if it were in any other circumstances, the redhead would certainly pin his full trust on his reliable bodyguard. Still, a childish jealousy erupted in his heart. If Kuroko was out of the equation, then surely Satsuki would like him, and then surely there wouldn't be another problem added on to the mountain of things he had to fret about.

But, inside him, he knew. Even without Kuroko, Satsuki would never like him.

"I am sure you know, but I... I have no feelings for Momoi-sama," he stated firmly. No doubt, he was one skilled at wearing a mask of apathy, almost blending with apathy entirely. Yet, there were signs. The slight tremor in Kuroko's voice didn't escape the Crown Prince's sharp ears.

"The fact that you're telling me this tells me otherwise," he noted.

Kuroko did not confirm nor deny his observation.

"Crown Prince, I would like to ask you for a favour," the blue-haired boy said.

"What is it?" Seijuro asked, his eyebrows raised.

Looking up at the prince, the pale blue eyes burned with a fire. Of what exactly, Seijuro couldn't quite tell. Perhaps, there were pain and awareness mingled together.

"Please change Momoi-sama's heart. This is the best decision for all of us," he said.

"Once Satsuki makes up her mind, nothing anyone else does or say can change it," the redhead immediately refuted.

The phantom soldier gave a resigned smile.

Nonetheless, he pressed on, "I know. But still, if it's you, Crown Prince, I believe it's possible."

The redhead didn't reply. Pawns could be controlled by intimidation, but feelings could never be forced and memories could never be forged. For Satsuki, that was the case. When she felt, she felt _hard_ , which was why she fell for Kuroko, one who was able to understand her. And that was what Seijuro lost in—his absence in the wagashi event, and his inability to understand love.

* * *

Satsuki's protests were useless, and despite Seijuro's earlier reluctance, he had no choice but to accept his position. Congratulary cheers filled the air when the two were wed, everyone missing or ignoring the frown on Satsuki's face and pensive tension of Seijuro's muscles. Still, their interactions outside of public remained the same, if he just ignored the discreet eye contact his bodyguard and his then wife exchanged and pushed away the newly attained spouse status they had.

Soon after, the shogun fell and Emperor Masaomi was hailed victorious. The shogun was forced to retirement, and although Satsuki was greatly relieved that her father was not slaughtered in cold blood, there was a distinct resentment in her eyes when she watched Seijuro. She never really blamed him directly, but still, their relationship was not quite the same anymore.

In a way, it was inevitable. He expected it all to happen.

The next change set in dramatically. After the shogun's defeat, there was nothing stopping the princes from unleashing their true potential. Shintaro was praised as a prodigy in archery, as he could shoot enemies with astounding accuracy even from miles away. Daiki became a hero, for he led troops out to battle and won every single one of them, and he got tired of all those endless victories to the point that he had cowered back into his laziness. Atsushi took his place and received recognition from the Emperor who rewarded him with buffets of the finest delicacies. The contented purple-haired giant thus began his ravage on more territories, causing more people to surrender. Even Ryota began to excel in whatever task he was assigned in (except matters concerning the brain), and was soon bored of everything.

The more they progressed, the more Seijuro felt left out.

 _This shouldn't be the case. I'm always a step ahead, never behind._

"Atsushi, why have you not been attending military training recently?"

 _This shouldn't be the case._

"The Emperor told me I don't have to, as long as I keep winning," Atsushi idly said.

"Indeed. Now, our battles have become your solo performances. Do you not know you are bringing down the morale of our soldiers?" Seijuro questioned, eyebrows scrunched.

Atsushi narrowed his eyes.

"What does it matter if we win? Besides, why do I have to listen to you, Sei-chin?"

Although his voice carried a lazy air in it as usual, there was another layer of derision.

 _This shouldn't be the case._

"I never said anything in the past because I thought I would never win against you, but I think that's going to change now. Considering how the Emperor is getting more dissatisfied with you, I may even become the Crown Prince at this rate."

 _This shouldn't be the case._

"Sushi-chan, what exactly are you talking about? You never wanted to be the Crown Prince before!" Satsuki muttered in disbelief.

"It's bothersome, but at least I'll eat anything I want," Atsushi stated, the words rolling out of his tongue like needles thrown lazily in random directions.

This shouldn't be the case.

"How foolish, Atsushi. If I have to put you down by force, then I will," he declared, red orbs penetrating. He took hold of a wooden sword.

"One-on-one. The one who goes down first loses. First to five loses."

The purple-haired giant shrugged, his lips morphing into a sinister grin.

Four matches down, and Seijuro went down for four times.

* * *

Seijuro knew. He could sense it. Something was taking form inside him. It had been residing there long since his mother's death, waiting for the day to come out and swallow his whole consciousness into darkness.

That day was then.

His left iris turned to that of a yellow shade. His heterochromatic orbs watched his purple-haired brother's every movement, and then he struck in for the kill.

"Because I am victorious over all, I am always the just."

Every attack was targeted at his brother's weak spots with penetrating force. Before long, his brother collapsed in front of him, staring up at him with what looked like terror and admiration.

All the spectators gawked at the scene in incredulity. He noticed how they shuddered. If they obeyed him out of respect before, they now obeyed him out of fear.

"Anyone who acts against me is never forgiven... Not even my parents."

He was no longer Seijuro, but the Crown Prince and soon-to-be Emperor.

And no one—not even his own family—could ever defy him. _Again._

* * *

A/N: This chapter basically follows most of canon events in a historical context, although yeah, there's no such thing as ankle break in fighting so I opted for another description that's similar to what Seijuro does when he's ankle-breaking people anyway. It's challenging to write Seijuro in a one-sided love (arguable if it's even love at the first place), but hopefully everyone remains IC so far. Sorry for tarnishing all the fluff with the gloom, but the next chapter is when things _really_ start going down. Hope you guys enjoyed this chapter!


	3. To Break Them and Himself

To Guest: Thank you!

* * *

 **III. To Break Them and Himself**

 _"Every Emperor leads his nation with glory. Yet, at the same time, the path is always a lonely one."_

* * *

Not before long, rumours of the second Seijuro spread among the whole palace—how he led the army with intimidation and force. No one had dared to ever disobey him anymore, or even think about usurping his position.

The status and power he had accumulated as days passed by. He had obtained another reliable ally, Mibuchi Reo, the military commander, as well as the support of several other noblemen. His father had fallen ill due to prolonged stress from work. Soon, the amalgamation of his efforts would come to light.

All the servants and military power were by his side. It didn't take much effort to get a servant to add a bit of poison into his father's medicine every day. His father's illness naturally worsened to the point of no return.

Unfortunately, his bodyguard who heard of his exchange with the responsible servant was unable to take it lying down.

"Crown Prince, this isn't right. How can you do such a thing to the Emperor?" Tetsuya questioned as soon as the servant left, his eyes blazing with determination. The righteousness of Tetsuya was what Seijuro came to admire before, but now, it only served as an obstacle in the redhead's conquest to ascending the throne. In other words, it was an irrelevancy that needed to be eliminated.

"What isn't? The Emperor is already at his last breath even without my interference. The sooner he leaves, the sooner the power struggle will end," Seijuro calmly explained, facing Tetsuya's gaze with an equally piercing stare of his. He doubted his brothers would put much of a struggle even so, but precautions were better than none. Daiki was too much of a wildcard, and Shintaro was more ambitious than he looked.

Yet, Tetsuya didn't shrink away from his gaze. Instead, the phantom bodyguard only stood by his ground.

"That is an excuse just made up on your part, Crown Prince. You… You've _changed_. The morale of the army has changed along with you. And as a soldier, I refuse to serve such a ruler. Momoi-sama… She won't be happy to hear of this too, and-"

 _Slash._

It happened in a flash. The shorter boy crumpled into a pool of scarlet blood, its bright red tainting his pale complexion. Seijuro looked down from above, his red silhouette blending into one with the blood on his hands.

"What audacious words you're uttering, Kuroko Tetsuya. I'll put you into place now for spouting such things brazenly despite having no power of your own," he said despite the subtle trembling of his hands. He had killed Tetsuya, the bodyguard whom he trusted and whose talents he discovered. Why did things have to end up the way they did?

Even when his breathing ceased, Tetsuya's eyes never wavered.

Later on, it was announced that Kuroko Tetsuya was killed for the crime of treason.

* * *

"Crown Prince, I've heard about it," was the first thing Satsuki said to him after the death of the traitor. From the biting edge of her voice, it was painfully obvious what she was referring to.

"Tetsu-kun… He's not a person who'll do such a thing. What exactly happened?" she murmured. Her morganite orbs studied her spouse for any trace of explanation. Seijuro returned her with a vacant look. He wasn't exactly surprised, but knowing the truth still did hurt.

She trusted Kuroko more than she trusted him.

"Yes, that is right. I killed him," he stated bluntly, observing how her initial scrutinising look transformed to that of despair and betrayal.

"N-No… Way…" she coughed out, choking in her muffled sobs. Seijuro watched her impassively.

"He dared to retaliate against me with his foolish ideals. That is his crime. You should accept it, Satsuki."

"N-No way…" she repeated once again. The glimmer of her eyes had long faded, and she was rendered to a motionless doll.

"Soon, I will be Emperor. Your father will live peacefully if he follows my orders. You will also be protected. Everything will be fine," he reassured with slight haste in a weak attempt to assemble any life inside her. But she only continued to mumble incoherently under her breath, her gaze unfocused and directed away from him.

"Satsuki, look at me," he ordered. The pink-haired girl remained delirious.

"Look at me," he repeated once more. The firmness of his voice caused the pink-haired girl to jump, her head lifting up to face him.

And then, it was like a wire inside her had snapped.

She clawed at him out of raw desperation, yelping at the familiar stranger she had gotten unaccustomed to, "No… Who are you? You're not the Sei-kun I know… In fact, none of you are the people I remember!"

"Return me! Return me Tetsu-kun! Return me everyone! Return me Sei-kun!"

Seijuro remained unfazed by her outburst. He only peered down at her coldly.

"I do not accept such insolence, even if it's from you. Bow your head down, Satsuki," he instructed. Then, he embraced her, her soft body sinking in his grip, perhaps both out of fear and resignation. She was crumpling like a fragile piece of paper slipping through his grasp, and he knew he was the root cause of it all. Despite claiming himself as a winner, he could do nothing to stop the change of his brothers from happening. Instead, he changed along with them, and had even slaughtered the one she loved because of this. But still, he wanted to hold on to the girl whose smile was reminiscent to spring. This illusion, at least, was something he wanted to protect.

So, with all his strength, he would clutch onto her.

"This time, I'll never let you go again."

* * *

When Seijuro visited his father at his bedside with his last breath, his red eyes were hardened and cold.

"Emperor, you once said that the losers are vanquished, and that dying is a weakness. That is exactly your state now," he muttered harshly. Trailing a finger over the soft fabric, the redhead's lips curled into a derisive grin, taking in the sickly pallor on his father's face.

"Now, it's time for me to take your place. I win."

Contrary to his thoughts, his heart ached defiantly.

 _Why?_ He had won, so he should be happy. He would be at a position where no one would ever threaten him again. But why was his body screaming at him that he wasn't okay?

When he tilted his head down to look at his father, he realised. Beneath the dull brown orbs of the loser, there was no resentment—only pride and relief.

"Heh… What a fine son you've become. How fine… Indeed. I… have no regrets," his father murmured. And just like that, the elder shut his eyes, serenity falling upon his wrinkled features. It was the first time he saw his father relax without any guard to his surroundings.

"…Is that all you have to say?" the redhead muttered, staring fixedly at the dying Emperor. He couldn't accept this. Why was the loser relieved, and the winner upset? It went against all the principles he had come to believe in. To win—

What did it mean to win?

The elder emitted a weak chuckle as he said, "What else… is there to say? To survive is to kill. Now, I'm tired. I'll join your mother in the afterlife…"

Leaving these words behind, the Emperor's breathing ceased. The immobile corpse had lost all regalness and grandeur that a ruler possessed. At that moment, his father was no longer a winner or a loser; he was just a normal human.

But then, what did that make Seijuro?

Clutching onto the fabric of the bedsheets, Seijuro stared at his now motionless father. The force of his grip caused his whole body to convulse in despair and grief.

"Why? Why don't you show more hatred?" he questioned, his eyelids turning wet. There was no reply.

"Why are you acting like you cared about Queen Mother at the brink of your death?" he questioned, resisting the urge to snivel. There was no reply.

 _Winners do not cry. They don't._

"How cruel you are, Father. I will not forgive you. I will show you just what it means to be a winner. You'll acknowledge me."

Yet, when there was no reply again, Seijuro knew that he would never receive the acknowledgement he was so after.

* * *

"Seijuro, the Emperor's death has something to do with you, don't you?"

It did not surprise him that his green-haired brother would make such a speculation. Shintaro had always been intelligent, which allowed him to attain knowledge other commoners would not otherwise obtain. At the same time, Shintaro knew his limits and didn't interfere in things beyond his control. Even if he himself didn't change and the world did, Shintaro would go along with what was necessary for survival. That was the difference between him and Tetsuya, and this fact allowed Seijuro to be more gracious to his brother.

"Does the answer matter, Shintaro?" Seijuro questioned. His brother shook his head.

"…No. The truth is what the one with power made out to be."

Seijuro smiled. His predictions were right after all.

"That is right. Because if you disobeyed me, I will not have mercy even if it's you, Shintaro."

The green-haired prince nodded mutely, his lips pursed.

"…I knew I would never have a chance at being the Crown Prince since my birth. My mother is merely a lowly-ranked concubine, but the Empress has given both of us a lot of benevolence nonetheless. For that, I am grateful," he started to say.

"I hope in future, you will become a King capable of compassion just like she was, Seijuro."

Something in Shintaro's words had awakened a lost feeling in Seijuro's heart. Perhaps it was responsibility. But he had already buried any irrelevancies unnecessary for victory inside him. And no one, not even his brothers, could ever unravel them again.

Seijuro nodded back.

"Of course."

* * *

Seijuro descended to the throne with the blessings of many. No prince ever dared to defy him, and lived under much trepidation and fear. But there was one thing that was clearly distant.

In a spite to control them, they had been tamed to follow him. Yet, that didn't shrink the distance between them. Everyone addressed him as Emperor, as no one dared to address him as affectionately as they did before. Ryota no longer addressed him as his great oldest brother. Daiki no longer played ball in his leisure time. Shintaro no longer challenged him in shogi. Atsushi no longer bugged Seijuro for snacks. Tetsuya, the glue to their friendship, was no longer there. And Satsuki was like the broken pieces of glass of their friendship, forever unrepaired.

They changed. The world changed. So he changed along with all of them. Victory was supposed to be the answer—it was supposed to help protect whatever remnants of them that were left. Yet, it ended up breaking everything that remained.

Wars were initiated, for Seijuro foresaw the economic benefits they would bring to the country. The Empire of Japan rapidly gained territory, but with it came the loss of lives and famine. Still, greed never spared him, and he continued to slaughter mindlessly and blindly through the battlefield.

He would be a great King. He would help the citizens out, like he had promised her. He would take care of them.

Those promises had burned along with the wind. He was a loser who failed to keep those promises. Now, he was just possessed by the demons of victory, though of course no one would dare to retaliate. No one would complain, as long as he led the kingdom to great heights.

Which he did. Victory. He could accept nothing less.

But amidst it all, he had lost something else. The love, which he once so craved for.

And he knew—he could foresee it. He would busy himself with political matters to the point that he would neglect his wife. Satsuki, depressed and forlorn, only busied herself with taking care of the citizens suffering from famine, no longer speaking to him a word. When the Empress eventually bore a son, he would educate him the way his father had done to him, and the whole vicious cycle would repeat like how generations inherited a curse. Occasionally, stray thoughts would wander in his mind. Was his father a past victim of such inflictions? Had his father really loved his mother after all? And then, he would brush them away without a single thought. For he was now Emperor, and he did not afford the luxury to think about such meaningless things.

A lone tear fell off his cheek. He was a winner, but an incomplete one.

* * *

A/N: And this concludes this threeshot. The original plan was more tragic in the sense that all the brothers died under the hands of Seijuro, but I thought that was too dramatic and uncharacteristic of Seijuro to do so anyway so I scrapped that. Kuroko had to die regardless. Other than the whole love triangle thingy going on, these two are simply polar opposites. Even until his death, I believe Kuroko will uphold his principles and I also believe Akashi will slaughter anyone who expresses such obvious retaliation against him. So long as there is Bokushi, there can be no Kuroko. And since Kuroko won in the main story, I let Akashi win here (that's a more realistic choice anyway xD). Anyway, this is my take on Akashi's character. He's ultimately a tragic character because at the end of the day, all he wanted was love. His change to Bokushi, I believe, is a way for him to keep up with his brothers. Feel free to offer your own interpretations of this ending as you please!


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